A stainless steel bucket

In today's troubled times it has 2 stories to tell. Stories about long-lasting relationships and saving the planet!!

My mom and dad got married 63 years ago. In those days, weddings, even those of very wealthy people, were simple affairs. You did not get an elaborate dinner. Cold drinks and ice cream were served. People came, wished, blessed the couple, and chatted. My parents' wedding was held in my maternal grandad's lovingly nurtured garden. Yes, this wedding did have a luxury added on — Nellie's band played happy songs. Cousins from abroad had come and they showed off their latest rock 'n' roll steps. And we have a video that captured those timeless memories.

Gifts were presented. Mostly envelopes with modest cash for the young couple to start a new life together. Family would give more valuable gifts. In today's time, I cannot help thinking how simple life was then. It did not matter whether you even took a gift and you did not have to worry so much about it. Most importantly, you attended weddings of people you really knew, so you knew what to give them!

But back to the steel bucket. One of the many gifts received by my Mom and Dad. And for me it represents so much that is lost in today's world. The bucket was gifted to her by Joaquim and his family. We called him Jackie (easier to pronounce as kids). He and his family lived in my grandmom's home and took care of the kids and cooked up delicious meals every day. This was his gift to the girl he had seen grow to be a happy bride. And for years it was used daily by her — those were the days of bucket baths. It had a steel mug with it. As a kid, I loved the bucket. It was heavy to lift but felt sturdy and strong. This bucket has lasted 63 years, as has my parents' marriage. A long-lasting relationship which has seen ups and downs, flourishing because what always mattered was keeping the love alive. And I recall with fondness the family that took care of my mother and then her 4 kids and many cousins.

Those were the days when the house help were called servants. And they served. But they served with so much affection they became a part of the family's tapestry. Each of their kids were our friends depending on our ages. We played house-house and chor police, and the bonds still remain. That to me is also relationship. Cutting across class and caste to be there for each other in spite of differing backgrounds. They brought onto our dining table their famed red hot fish curry. Ground on the stone daily, it became a must-have at our meal, and the recipe remains a family traditional one.

We learnt to live with differences and respect. To reach beyond and create ties that cut across society's created sections. They were a Christian family in a Muslim home. The Biryani on Eid was looked forward to as much as the Star on Christmas and the midnight mass. We watched Sunday movies together and cried when Amitabh Bachan died in Sholay. When Jackie and Christine, his wife, retired to Goa, with them went an era where bonds that last were built.

The steel bucket tells me another story too. How things can last if they are meant to. And that we don't need to throw things away just because we want to. In today's world, where we create garbage daily, damaging and destroying our earth and oceans, I look at this bucket and say, what happened? Why can they not make things last and stay. Why build things to throw away? What is the meaning of progress if 2 years is a lifespan of anything we create?

Relationships last if we invest in them. People love us if we accept them as they are. We will save the earth if we stop consuming and start recycling again and being responsible about how much we take from our earth and sea. Our steel bucket is going strong at 63.

My parents are going strong at 63. Let's preserve humanity and our planet. Find and cherish the steel buckets in your life!